I always enjoy the adults who attend sporting events. Well—enjoy might be a strong word. Some of them are downright exhausting, but for the most part, they’re wildly entertaining. Especially the ones who generously share their extensive coaching experience by yelling brilliant strategies from the stands. These folks always know exactly which play should have been called and which one definitely needs to be called next. Offense, defense—doesn’t matter. They’ve got it all covered.
Recently, I was at a football game and spotted what I can only assume was a male parental unit slowly descending from the stands like a man on a mission. He made his way to the grassy area near the sideline, maintaining a respectable distance—at first. But then he spent a good chunk of the night passionately yelling, “It’s coming this way!” over and over again.
Now, “it” referred to the play. And clearly, he was miffed that the coaches weren’t heeding his clairvoyant warnings. Eventually, he began inching his way further downfield, into areas that are very much not for parents—or anyone not wearing a headset. Still, before every snap: “It’s coming this way!” And, wouldn’t you know it? Eventually, it did come this way. He was thrilled. So thrilled, in fact, that he gave the coaches a smug glare… from behind their backs, of course.
You’ll find parents like this at just about every game. They’re especially common at the big-ticket sports—football, basketball, baseball. Probably because those are American classics, and people feel like they know the rules.
Of course, how well they actually know the rules? Well, that’s a rant for another day.
e.
About the Author
